Stopping Premarital Sex and My Christian Journey

We are going deep and personal today.

Ok I am laughing because of the subject matter and cos as at twenty minutes ago, ( i wrote this post on the 15th and edited today) I didn't even know I was going to write a post , not to talk of writing this particular post on premarital sex.
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Although premarital sex and sex generally is a topic I would eventually have written on sha cos Hello! I am team celibate. Also someone asked me a question on abstinence sometime ago and i had a draft since March titled " you can also abstain".
Soooooooo I was doing blog rounds and I was at Wale's blog when I read this post and as I was dropping my comment, it took me back to those days long long ago lol ( in reality, not so long, just a few years ago).

Hmmmm! I remember when the word of God came in 2011 to stop having premarital sex. In short-keep it locked down until I get married-.
I was very puzzled at such a seemingly unnecessary and impossible request. Seriously! It seemed like God just wanted to get on my case, after all it wasn't like I was hurting anybody. Hahaha.
Besides, how on earth would I even find or keep a boyfriend, if I wasn't having sex. Looooooooool.
( No mind my thought process then as per I was just coming up).
Pic Credit
You see! The kind of guys I knew or dated or even had as friends then were the type that also had that mentality. The women I knew who were virgins were hardly virgins because of God or strong faith.

More like a mentality of ' ain't seen no man worthy enough to take this' . Loooool.
I am sure you are starting to see a pattern here. The people surrounding me also didn't have any strong conviction against premarital sex.

As for me, I wasn't close to God then so I did not take his commandments seriously, neither did I have any close relationship with Jesus. So it was all about Me! Me! Me!

After some time, I overcame my anger (lol) and confusion at the command and basically had a talk with myself.
After all, I had nothing to lose, also I need breakthrough and help from God desperately then. Let's just say my lack of knowledge made me easy fodder for Satan and his agents.
Without much optimism. I decided to see what would happen. Luckily, I was dating one Muslim
guy then, very angry combustible guy, also a lawyer, ( but oh so so so cute) ok I digress,  so it wasn't hard to tell him Mba!( No) I no do again.  Hehehe.
Lol. I don't know why I am laughing ok. Maybe it's the memory lane thingy. And how silly I used to be.

Adjusts self and puts in serious face.

Sooooooooo! That was how I started the waiting oh, and keeping it locked town. Looool. Why does that image remind me of a chastity belt
It wasn't fun at first ( it still isn't fun now too, but easier) and I was waiting and hating it. 
( I hated that God forced me to be celibate but along the line i came across Ayo's Waiting and Loving it series and then I changed my mentality and realized that I wasn't the only one, people were obeying God and they managed, some people even married as virgins so why was I whining)  hello eziaha and Inthemidstofher so I basically manned up ( and was also comforted that some men too were waiting).

Whether loving it or hating it, I OBEYED.
Then like film like film, lol, I started HEARING from God, and to be honest at first i didn't realize it was God. It was all so new to me. I wasn't even particularly a serious Christian then but looking back now, God apparently wanted me to cut of from that sin first because it would have affected what kay ahead.

A little while after, God gave me some specific instructions, which I obeyed, one of which was to  change my church.

Today, I am a Sunday School teacher, some of my students include people who are old enough to be my grandmother all by the grace of God and the wisdom of the Holy Spirit.. But believe me, I will not be where I am today if I had not heard that instruction. 
And I would never have heard that instruction if I was still fornicating ( and that is one thing premarital sex or adultery does, takes you far
and farther from God ) He is Holy after all.

Shortly after I changed my church, suddenly I had knowledge, me that always hated going to church suddenly found a zeal I never knew I had. You need to know how unzealous I used to be. Loooool.

As in, I could go months without stepping into any church. I just did not see what the big deal  was ( and looking back now I was the same in secondary school and University if not worse sef, although maybe my Muslim background had a little to do with that sha) . 
Oh I didn't tell, you! My dad is a Muslim ( a topic for another day)  just that he allowed us all free hand (Ironically, he used to confront me when I stayed home on Sundays, he will be like " whether Christian or Muslim, be committed, lol! I was such a lazy Christian ehn"). I became a Christian in secondary school, but not born again.

Ironically (again)  I used to attend a " happening church ", but it was not unlike me to carry a novel to church and be reading during service. Those services no move me shi- shi. But suddenly, I was at this conservative church which God directed me to, where they prayed and prayed and prayed some more, and my life changed literally. Suddenly, I had spiritual knowledge, I knew prayer points, I was being shown revelations, my people! It was like film.
It was unbelievable. I was like chai! God ! Why you no send me to this kind of church since. Lol.
God has specific timing for everything.

So where am I going with this my ( loooong) story, it is that premarital sex aka formication is a sin. 
Whether you like it or not.

The bible expressly states it as such. Not only that, it is a sin against our body in First Corinthans 6:18.

18 Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

Besides, you get to overcome soul ties ( believe me one of the reasons why it took me seven years to let my ex go  was this pesky soul ties.

You also get to avoid STDs, pregnancy scares, guilt, loss of virtues, self blame, loss of self esteem etc.
 Most importantly though,  you are obeying your creator and not sinning against your body.

I guarantee that you will have a much better relationship with God. Just try it and see.
One day at a time.
I understand however how hard it is to overcome. I also experienced it too and soon, I will
share some tips in overcoming or stopping premarital sex.
Tips that helped me that is. Because it was a long hard road oh, overcoming the act of penetrative sex itself and other sexual acts which weren't penetrative. The latter took even more time but I thank God.

But it is very possible. If I can do it, you too can. Just take that first step of being born again if you aren't already. Let me not tell you lie, without Jesus, my old self could NOT have done it.
And if you are, still take that first step of confessing your sins to God. He will hear you, he loves you. It doesn't matter how many men or women you have slept with, neither does it matter how many 
abortions you have done or had done for you.

I thought it was impossible but here I am after a long hard road. Believe me it was not easy but God's grace is sufficient.

Pls feel free to get in touch with me by email or through the comment section if you have anything to share, ask or add.
Thank you for reading my post. Loooooooove you.


  1. Thank God for your life dear! Pre-marital sex brings a lot of strings that are difficult to cut in the long run. I pray God continues to use you to minister His word to others.

    Have an awesome new month!

    Precious Core Blog

    1. Thanks Precious. It's always good to hear from and you and also read your posts.
      Thanks so much.
      Will be by yours shortly.
      Wish you same.

  2. God is indeed working in your life and I pray He rewards you according to your heart desires. Amen

    1. Thanks my dear. I appreciate it a lot.


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